Tuesday 19 June 2007

Hustle and Bustle

Occasionally, we get spin-offs. Sometimes, these can be watchable (such as Frasier, Torchwood and Ashes to Ashes. I don't care if the last one hasn't aired yet, it's going to be brilliant). Sometimes, they aren't so watchable (such as Joey, Celebrity Big Brother or Swiss Toni). However, sometimes we get some things which are worse than a spin-off. I don't know if this particular genre even has a name, but I'm on about the programs which discuss the show that's just been aired. I'm talking about rubbish such as "Pure 24", "Wife Swap: The Aftermath" and "Russell Brand Talks About His Genitals After Big Brother Has Aired".

The rubbish episodes of The Real Hustle always follow the same plotline, kind of like My Family.


However, one of these particular shows is half enjoyable. I'm on about BBC3's "The Real Hustle". It isn't technically a discussion show, it's an original show in it's own right. But the fact is they couldn't have just called it "Conmen" or "Attractive People Rob Pedestrians". No, they had to try and leech in the Hustle fans. The show is utterly hilarious though. Sometimes, the cons are good. Othertimes, they are a bit rubbish. The rubbish episodes of The Real Hustle always follow the same plotline, kind of like My Family. It's always like this:

NARRATOR:
"Sometimes, people can try and sell you stuff which is actually cheaper than what they say it is, we call this hustle "The Selling Things for More Expensive Than They Actually Are Scam".

[GIANT TITLE ON SCREEN: "The Selling Things for More Expensive Than They Actually Are Scam."]

NARRATOR:
"Alex has walked in to this unsuspecting building with a bottle of champagne/box of televisions/eight billion pounds. He then convinces somebody to take it for a cheap price"

ALEX:
"Would you like this expensive item for a cheap price?"

UNSUSPECTING PERSON:
"Yes."

NARRATOR:
"What the unsuspecting person doesn't know is that what they've just paid for the item is actually MORE than what the item cost. Hahaha. What an idiot!"

*Flashback*

ALEX:
"You see, what I did was replace the expensive looking item for a cheap imitation"

NARRATOR:
"But how did he do it?"

ALEX
"I replaced it with an imitation product.""

NARRATOR:
"Let's see that from ANOTHER angle"

...etc, etc...

UNSUSPECTING PERSON:
(Talking to camera) "I don't know what happened. He came in and said that it was expensive and was selling it for cheap. What a fool I feel."

[CUT TO: Alex in the studio]

ALEX:
"Always remember that before somebody sells you something, make sure you check I.D and don't be a fucking idiot."

Brilliant. In every episode, there is always at least one scam which follows this exact structure.

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